I’m a monster. A dick hungry monster. Why. Why the fuck do I do and say the shit that I do and sayyy when I drink.
Regardless of looking back at last night’s Harlow, it was at hell of a night out! Best one in a long time 😂 maybe grab some popcorn, let’s see how I piece this together okurr.
*btw I’ve attempted writing this one a few times but I keep shaking my head at myself or falling asleep to recover.
Ok so. After a day of serious self love and weekend prep and hours of make up- my favorite thing to do. That shit was bomb. Fuck me uuup. Tits out for the boys. Me and the puss were ready to go..
Get to Will’s house for some drinks. It’s always a show and we were sticking to our poor decision making and holy fuck did we ever.
Jon was passed out on the couch (great party house btw) and Seb (Wills sexy French roommate) was showering so we got to making drinks time to wake these fuckers up. The night goes by, were drinking feeling lit. Laughing my ass off. I Remember Will talking about my titties being out like crazy. Told them to make sure they stay in check and Jon (shiiit like I just wanna see what the dick looks like ok) said he’d hold em all night if needed be. Me and 3 dicks. Tequila. We knew we were in for a wild fucking night hahaha.
Alright shit escalates were out before going to the next place and so on. I vaguely remember lots of dick talk flirty crazy wild shit. Pretty sure I said if I didn’t get someone decent to take home I’d take all three. 👈 who the fuck is that. Like why. Shaking my damn head at myself so much my neck hurts.
We get to the next place there’s dancing and dick and hoes everywhere more of our friends. Tequila shots being done from my cleavage. I think there was a dick comparison between Will and Jon. I made a great judge, very hands on.
This is where it gets blurry. Well more than it already is.
So Cayle was out too, another dick i never touched woohoo. And then there’s this tanner guy. I got him to come meet up there. I remember talking to him but that’s about it? Next thing you know I’m back at the strippers. Except it’s after hours like that place is closed, door was locked. Buddy just text someone and a minute later door opened. And boom mini party, waitresses still there place to ourselves. Like dope. So. Here. Here s where I somewhat remember kissing some chick? Bitting Wills neck. A guy I used to sleep with was there too and I woke up with a message from him? So there’s that I don’t know what happened there.
So I don’t know why I did this, but Cayle called and said let’s me up and like…. I did? So I ditched the after party. Let’s skip everything and go straight to the D.
Unfortunately, it was smaller than I had imagined. But. He made up for it in other areas. That tongue game 👌 shit I just had the place flooded. 2 hours. 3 orgasms.
It was fun lol seemed like he was ready to stay the night though! And i have a no sleepovers rules so I tell him he should call a cab. And this mf says “alright, let me go down while I wait”
So that happened. Dear lord sweet baby yeezus.
Checked my snap before passing out and Will, Seb and Jon were still going buck wild at Wills, my hair was too fucked to go back. That and I would’ve probably try to stick one of their dicks in my mouth, if not all. Ain’t no shame ladies do yo thang. I’m gonna assume taking 3 dicks is not what Missy was referring to.
Woke up to a message from tanner saying
“One minute you had your hands down my pants and having a good time next thing you know you’re out the door with them”
Aaahahahahaha shit, just so grabby.
You guys. I’ve got more. But I’m dead. And I need to pass tf out. Maybe I’ll remember more tomorrow because I’m pretty sure I spent most of today still drunk.
For a below average dick I’m some kind of sore I’ll tell ya that. Puss better buck up before tomorrow or I’ll have to pass lol.
*I fell asleep before posting this hahah faaail.